what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
