I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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