drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize