My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
