if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize