Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
