Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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