he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize