that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
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Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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