real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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