I want to have your abortion
I'm jealous of your bromance
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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