Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
