Sry I called you an 8
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
