What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
What a dumb baby whore.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize