just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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