she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
A+ Viking dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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