I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
