if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
3pm strippers are depressing
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize
