If i come over, it means nothing
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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