Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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