I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
