Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I lost the right to judge tonight
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
