I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
