She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize