Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
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If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
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how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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