You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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