i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Everything about him screamed your future.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
