Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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