I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
