his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Randomize