What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
