and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
you will always have a special place in my vag
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
as a side note pls kill me
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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