he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
