there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
the raccoons are back...
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