1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
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