the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
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I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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