Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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