"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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