I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
