I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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