Me too!
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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