Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
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