you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
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