Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
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there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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