He is an equal opportunity slut.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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