They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
