It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize