I wanna bring you to show and tell
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
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