I'm laying in your front yard are you home
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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