I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize