ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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